What once seemed ruinous and catastrophic is now being uplifted joyously and sometimes even humorously. Divorce has been reframed as “chic” and “having its moment.” 

Although divorce is not the outcome that people strive for when getting hitched, the reality is that a surprising number of marriages end in divorce. So while it isn’t necessarily the happy ending we culturally idealize, the reframing of divorce embraces that idea that the end of a significant life chapter is an opportunity to experience a new kind of happiness.

Marriage is traditionally viewed as a milestone of “having it together” in becoming a stable adult. In previous generations, many felt pressured to remain as spouses “til death do us part”—even if the typical day in their married life was messy or miserable. Back then, there seemed to be no real choice out of a doomed marriage: stay and tough it out, or separate but be labeled with the “divorcee” stigma for the rest of your life. 

Widely held beliefs have shifted. Many people now feel like they do have a choice. “Divorce” isn’t taboo anymore. It’s a choice that many people feel confident in making for themselves according to their own personal beliefs and morals, commonly shared by others experiencing similar life experiences. 

The internet has enabled millions of people to broadcast their ups and downs through life. Online discourse has helped raise awareness around issues of gender equality and mental health, issues that can affect anyone. People are more willing to share what they have learned through hard times, especially when it comes difficult subjects that center around relationship conflict.

Some of the keys in sustaining a healthy relationship, like clear boundaries and open communication, also apply to navigating a divorce with civility and conscientiousness. Family structures that involve single parenting and co-parenting have become more common and socially accepted. Cordiality between exes is even viewed by many as the ultimate display of maturity. 

Getting a divorce has never been traditionally easy. It’s a process that can rile up emotions as paperwork and legal fees stack up. To avoid the traditional divorce process, many, including high-net-worth individuals, are seeking divorce mediation. Instead of hiring lawyers and going to court with the possibility of things getting ugly, the couple meets with a divorce mediator to discuss their issues in private. The divorce mediator helps make the process smoother by facilitating discussions between the two people in a way that allows for each person to express themselves openly while the other person listens to what they have to say. The process allows parties to negotiate with one another directly, with each person having their say in finalizing the terms of their divorce settlement. 

Mediation helps cool things down a notch, which aligns with the new mindset on relationships and marriage. Why make anything harder than it needs to be? Across the country, especially in Orange County, people are discovering that conscious uncoupling is possible for them. The family law mediation process can help marriages end in harmony rather than hostility. 

Over the years, many (even most!) of my friends have gone through at least one divorce. Marriage in the modern world is a difficult thing at the best of times, and at the worst it can be downright impossible.
I’ve noticed that these relationships have ended in one of three ways. First is the classic acrimonious end to a relationship, where one or both parties have gotten so fed up with one another that the love that had once blossomed had turned to complete hatred, revulsion, and burning resentment.

The other two are a little more somber. The second trend is that the couple have just naturally drifted apart, and at some point they have found themselves totally disconnected and incapable of feeling much of anything for their partner. These tend to end on friendlier terms, and it’s easy for them to pack up and move on, sharing custody of their children if they have them with little to no issue.
The final trend are relationships where the couple still love one another and want desperately for their marriage to work, they just have no idea how to fix the issues that are causing them to unravel. These endings are tragic, but thankfully there may be a possible solution that has emerged from a very unlikely source.
Orange County divorce mediator Colleen McNamee has seen enough of these types of relationships over the years that she’s developed a system in which the couple may be able to finally reconcile. The system involves drafting a marriage contract, which stipulates what each person in the relationship MUST do in order to keep the marriage afloat. If they breech the contract, the divorce can be triggered by the other party and the pre-arranged mediated settlement is submitted to the court.
It’s odd to find a divorce mediator that does their best to help heal the rifts in a relationship rather than capitalize on them, but that’s how the McNamee Mediation firm works – they genuinely care about their clients and want their marriages to succeed. The firm has been helping those couples who weren’t able to reconcile reach an equitable settlement for decades, and it has an impressive list of testimonials that attest to the care and attention the team puts into every case. Have a look:

Colleen makes a sad and difficult process easier. She is smart, calming, knowledgeable, and has the ability to make a divorcing couple come together to an agreement, which is a much-better solution than hiring divorce attorneys who have the goal of pinning you against each other so they make more money.

She is worth every penny, as she is amazing at what she does. It’ll be much cheaper than using attorneys or a mediator who isn’t as good and will take longer. We used another mediator at first and it was such a waste of time and money.

Choose her, settle, and move on with your life.

Read Walt W.‘s review of McNamee Mediations on Yelp

I highly recommend mediation to anyone that is considering a divorce. It works best with personalities that are honorable & reasonable. Basically, if one of you is a POS then it won’t work and/or be very challenging. Individually hiring Attorneys will only have you fight out your interest (it will drive your interest unreasonably upwards, painfully emotionally, drag things out & cost a TON more) VS Mediators will help you figure things out the best possible way for both and/or your family (keeps you in check, less pain – u will still pout, but less time & reasonable costs). Two totally different experiences. We were truly able to walk away more amicable! This also reflected into our circle of friends which helped sooth that angle. I owe a huge part of that to Colleen. She combines her experiences in family law from working on both sides so you understand the process. She is very compassionate. Her sensitivity will help things move forward. You will be truly lucky if you retain her.

Marriage has never been easy, but now more than ever many couples need to get help from wherever they can find it. The marriage contracts created by McNamee Mediations may be the push they need to get back on track. If your marriage is on the rocks, you have nothing to lose by calling today:
McNamee Mediations
+19492233836
4590 MacArthur Blvd Suite 500, Newport Beach, CA 92660